eat less. move more.

I am sitting outside in the sanctuary of a back yard my mom has created and I am enjoying a bit of pear cobbler that she just pulled out of the oven.

Yesterday was a day filled with sugar highs and crashes. My manager brought in candy because we all had to work on the fourth of July. Since I worked a double, I was eating candy all day. At the end of the night, I was crabby and achy from the abundance of sugar and the lack of water in my body.

Instead of taking a nap in between shifts, I did some homework, cleaned my clothes, hydrated like crazy, and did some yoga followed by some sit-ups. Hell Yeah!

A guy asked me for my number at work yesterday. I recognized the grocer from high school but could not tell you what his name is. I could be interested. Bottom line, it made me feel good. It made me feel like an attractive lady, and that does not happen very often.

Morning Munchies

I woke up around 7:45 this morning and got up with the intention of going right back to sleep. I went into the kitchen to see what time it was and ate two oreos.

Why? I wasn't hungry. This kind of still asleep eating is something that I have been doing a lot of since I have moved home. usually it happens in the middle of the night.

Do I need to be locked up in my room? Part of the reason I want to solve my food addiction is so I can sleep better. I'm sure it's hard on my body to rest when it is constantly digesting something and creating energy that won't be used, but stored.

Today marks July 1st. I am going to follow art/life project completely this month and in order to do that I should follow the food restriction: nothing with more then 10 ingredients listed on the package. I am going to add to that a water challenge for myself. I am going to drink 2000 ounces of water in July. If I drink 1984 that is 64 ounces for every day. I decided to up the atty and give myself extra hydration on days when I work out.

I am kind of excited about this no more then ten ingredients thing because that limits me to not very many things at the pepper. I may even have to bring my own stuff to snack on, which is not a bad idea.

I all of the sudden feel really motivated to get up and clean and do homework till my date with papa. Whooooo!

Anti-chubb movement

I have been thinking a lot about why I am fat. I am ready to make a change to start feeling better about my body and the world that it lives in.

In order to do this, I know that I will have to make some major lifestyle changes. Before I can really commit to this giant leap, I would like to determine why I over eat. What is my soul hungry for that I keep replacing with food?

Through this blog, I am going to record how I feel before and after I eat. This may not be fun, or pretty, but it will be honest.

I have always been an over eater. I derive so much pleasure from eating. My earliest memory of eating for no other reason than because I wanted to taste, I wanted to eat, was a summer when I was about 8 years old. I remember taking three or four of these Italian breakfast cookies and eating them outside in the front yard. I knew that what I was doing was wrong, that's why I was hiding it in the front yard. Ever since I was a little girl, a lot of shame is associated with food.

Not that it has ever stopped me.

Part of me feels that if I can uncover the shame that I feel about my body and the events that cause me to over-eat then my body can recover and heal from the abuse I have put it through over the years.

I am only twenty-three and I want to once and for all lose some poundage. No surgery, no diet programs. Just me. I have tried Weight Watchers, and it worked for a while. I have tried South Beach, and that worked for a week or two.

Can I quit over-eating cold turkey?